How long did it take to finish the adoption?
2 years, 8 months, 1 week, 5 days
What do you get when you put lawyers and politician's in charge? Easy answer (for just about anything), but in the case of Vietnamese adoptions, a mess.
The following two posts were listed on the US Embassy in Hanoi's
website today.
http://vietnam.usembassy.gov/adoption_warning0408.html
http://vietnam.usembassy.gov/irreg_adoptions042508.html
We are very upset by these posts. When you read these posts, it is from the US Embassy, which makes it sound like the Vietnamese government is totally at fault. That is furthest from the truth. Both governments are equally responsible for the mess they have created.
Please continue to pray for our family.
Good morning everyone. Yes we’re still here. And, unfortunately, yes we’re still waiting. There have been many things going on with this adoption and, unfortunately, none of them have been good. Some of the latest news is that the new agreement between Vietnam and the US (which needed to be agreed to by the end of March) was not agreed to and thus the program will be shutting down come September 1st. Hmmmmm, feels a little like déjà vu here. For those of you who went through this with us the first time, this is the same exact thing that happened before. The difference this time is that we’ve been told from reliable sources that if we don’t receive a referral and have our papers into a certain department by the end of June, don’t expect an adoption to happen. And, worse yet, quite a few provinces have decided not to cooperate with the US and thus aren’t handing out referrals to any US family. Yes there are still adoptions happening but they are going to other countries. What do you say is causing a lot of this friction, well, to be honest, I’m not entirely sure but again, my reliable sources say that the US is demanding things from Vietnam and Vietnam is saying that’s not the way things are done in their culture and thus are demanding things from the US. Thus, the friction.
What I’m saying here is, God is completely in control of the situation. Only He knows if we are meant to have another child. What I’m asking here is, if you’ve forgotten about us (which is understandable since I haven’t sent an update in eons) or you haven’t been praying for us, I’m asking that you please beef up those prayers. Now, you ask, what do I pray for? I am not asking that you pray that God give us a second daughter from Vietnam. Although believe me that is what I want more than anything. What I am asking you to do is pray that God’s Will be done. And, that God will show us the way. I want to do His will, not mine. If I had my way I’d be a mommy to two beautiful little girls. However, I also realize that God granted us our dream once and it was a huge dream. We got exactly what we asked for. It was almost as if we created this beautiful little girl on the computer on our own and hit the order button. I want now for God to show me what He wants. If we aren’t to adopt again, although my heart will ache, I will follow God completely. If we are but maybe we’ve gone the wrong direction, please may God show us the way. So please, pray with us for God’s Will to be done.
Hang in there with us. You are all loved dearly and Richard, Lilli and I appreciate your friendship more than you will ever know. To our families, thank you for hanging in there with us. We love you so much!
Well with some unsettled weather today, my outdoor plans were delayed. So Lilli and I took in another movie (we had a few free passes that really helped). We went to see College Road Trip. It was cute, adorable and heartwarming. We enjoyed it thoroughly.
The movie presented another key daddy-daughter moment. Please let me never be as controlling and over-protective as the Martin Lawrence charachter. It is one thing to love your daughter, but that was just over dominating. I know it was overacted for comedic purposes, but God please, let me love but not control.
Now tomorrow should be interesting, Lilli saw an ad for a Father of the Bride double feature and wants to watch it. Even before I had a daughter, I was blubbering fool watching those two movies. Pass the tissues.
If there is one thing that has gotten me through this ordeal, it is the precious gift that God blessed us with in 2002, Lilli. It has been a blessing watching her grow. Her heart to help others is truly genuine, and I can't help but think what a great big sister she could be (which usually doesn't help my frustration factor.) But it is so true. That is why I know God has a sister for her.
This weekend, Kristi has gotten away for a little R&R, and daddy and Lilli get a weekend together. Tonight we had dinner and a movie. As we were waiting for dinner, we were working on the kids games, and she was telling me how she would teach it. Her intelligence and imagination is unbelievable.
Then we went to see the movie Nim's Island. A fabulous story about...you guessed it, a father and his unbelievably imaginative daughter. It was a perfect date.
It should not have taken this long. Sure international adoptions have idiosyncrasies, but much of this was avoidable.
The biggest challenge has been the lack of planning from our agency. Our agency began facilitating adoptions in Vietnam again in April 2006. And then immediately began to plan changes. They had three years to plan these changes while Vietnam was closed to US adoptions from 2003-2006. The timing on their changes shows a complete lack of respect for the families and the children.
Yes there have been several US and Vietnam government changes, but most of these have been procedural, and would only have accounted for a week or two of extra time.
This process has reminded us how important it is to keep the faith. You can always count on the government to make things more difficult, and you can definitely not count on our agency. So our faith in God, and His timing, is all we can rely on.
Keep praying. Keep seeking. KEEP THE FAITH!
